I Blame My Mother

Dear Mister Golfer,

I hope you are enjoying the beautiful weather out there today. It seems that the wind has your swing a little off as your golf ball landed in my toddler’s bed this afternoon. This has happened so many times that I have the clean up down pat. Luckily for you, I learned golfers have no liability on damage like this otherwise I would be chasing you down the fairway like the first time it happened. Poor college kid. He got an earful from a crazy lady not knowing how to deal with glass all over her kid’s crib. Must be nice to cause as much damage as you want without a care in the world. 

I appreciate the reminder that I needed to dust the window sills but I could have done without the glass shards blown from one side of the room to the other. Did you know that I even found glass in the room adjacent to the baby’s room. How does that happen? Next time you are planning to play a round, give me a call and I will set up the video camera to see if we can figure it out. Your bad shot will go towards a little research on the projection route of glass shards.

I understand that it was my choice to live on the seventh fairway and I take the risk of windows breaking (shattered skylights, damaged cars, etc.). I was just hoping that the golfers would be of better quality. With all the windows we have been replacing maybe we could split the difference on some golf lessons instead. You probably can’t afford lessons after paying so much for those expensive Nike golf balls that always disappear (through someone’s window) when you hit them. Let me know and we’ll set something up.

Thanks again for the extra housework today! It’s nice you want to keep me on my toes.

Yours Truly,

The Crazy Lady with glass in her shoe